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How to identify your money values
When our values and spending don’t align there’s friction that creates anxiety and bad decisions. Here’s how to align your money values for abundance. Create more abundance by paying off high-interest rate debt with the free 7-Step Credit Card Debt Slasher here.
What are money values?
Show me how you spend your money and we’ll know your money values. Often, what we say we value isn’t represented in our budget or our spending. This disconnect creates a level of anxiety, sometimes a light and sometimes a heavy but low-level vibration in our lives.
Like attracts like and that unto itself is drawn.
That means this low-level vibration keeps us in a loop of financial anxiety, financial stress and possibly financial depression from which it’s hard to break. This often leads to a pile of credit card debt.
Hear how to identify and align your money values:
The value in aligning your money values
Do you think your values dictate how you spend your money?
Define your own success
One of the biggest causes of our unhappiness is when our spending and our values don’t align with each other. In our consumer society and especially in the queer community, many of us are spending for acceptance, but that acceptance is fleeting. So, like a drug, we have to spend more for maintaining a level of approval.
David experienced this in his own life and didn’t realize it until years later after much introspection. But much of his part of our $51,000 in credit card debt was from buying dinners and rounds of drinks for friends. Upon reflection, he realized he was doing this to buy these friends, not simply being nice to them.
If he buys them food and wine, they must love him. Have you experienced this? If you have, why? We rarely dig this deep in our money story.
So, why are we spending our money on social acceptance?
We rarely ask or define for ourselves what we value. Most of us assume the values that were projected on us from birth by parents, school, society and more. We assume our beliefs, including those about money – our financial DNA – even before we’re six years old.
A great way to see what we’re chasing is by doing a spending analysis. Then, we can see what our money is going to and ask ourselves if that spending is making us truly happy. If despite all the fancy clothes and cocktails and events and stuff, we aren’t truly, deeply and authentically happy, then our spending isn’t aligning with our values . . . and we’ll be chasing a dragon for our whole lives that we’ve never ridden.
How a money coach can help you with your money values
Megan Lathrop has been in financial services for many years, having started as a financial advisor with a book of businesses. She realized that she was limited to how holistically she could help her clients as a financial advisor and transitioned into a money coach. Lathrop is a pioneer in the field of money coaching, as it literally did not exist a few years ago.
A money coach is like a life coach, except one who focuses on your money, your relationship to money, and your beliefs about money. We often talk about the need to tap into our limiting money beliefs, especially for the queer community, and as a money coach, that’s what Lathrop does. Money coaching is “designed to connect your values to your money, get your money under control, plan a path for your future financial goals, and the confidence to make it happen.”
Who needs a money coach?
Before we think about how much money we need for this and that, before we create financial plans, we should clearly understand what it is we most want out of life. That’s why we talk about our “why” so much. It’s only through understanding our why that we can get our relationship with money in line with our goals and dreams, and then let us live according to our values.
Watch this Queer Money Follow-Up to the above episode:
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Get more tools to align your money values:
- 6 Ways to Better Manage Your Money
- How to Pay Off Credit Card Debt in 2022
- The Power in Aligning Our Values and Standards
We’re David and John Auten-Schneider, the Debt Free Guys (www.debtfreeguys.com) and hosts of the Queer Money® podcast. We help queer people (and allies) live fabulously not fabulously broke by helping them 1) pay off credit card debt, 2) become part- or full-time entrepreneurs and 3) save and invest for retirement.