Hi there! You new here? We love that you found our gay little corner of the web. Here at Debt Free Guys, we’re all about helping queer people live lives they truly love inside and out. We think happiness is a 360-degree experience (purpose, love, money, wellness, and lifestyle) that you also deserve. After reading our article below, see how we can help you more here.
Having the gay money talk
‘How do I get my partner to talk about money’ is the most frequent question we get. So, let’s tackle the gay money talk, adding a rainbow flavor to finance. 10X the success of this talk by grabbing your free copy of the 5 Building Blocks of a Happy Gay Life here.
Hear how a queer advisor had the gay money talk with her wife:
The reality of gay financial planning
In 2013, Cathy and her partner at the time, Karla Arguello, were one of six same-sex couples selected to sue Florida’s Clerk of Courts for the right to marry. An exciting story made for the movies, Cathy shares how circumstances led to her and her now her wife, Karla, being the first same-sex couple to be married in the state of Florida. This is the first step Cathy and Karla took to help our LGBT family in Florida take a step towards equality.
Cathy shares her and Karla’s financial considerations both before and after marriage, including health benefits, child adoption credits and health club memberships. These are considerations all people, including queer couples, should consider both before and after marriage.
Cathy and Karla later filed another suit against Florida for refusing to allow Cathy’s name on her own children’s birth certificates. Cathy and Karla won that case and helped our LGBT family in Florida take another step towards equality.
Gay financial planning
As a financial advisor and a trailblazer for the queer community, Cathy can provide unique insight for LGBT financial planning for single people, partners and spouses.
Cathy created a video with our friends at GuideVine that lays out what you should know about queer financial planning.
Cathy shares her and Karla’s financial considerations both before and after marriage, including health benefits, child adoption credits and health club memberships. Cathy even shares an experience with Karla while they were standing in the grocery aisle discussing the importance of olives.
Cathy and Karla later filed another suit against Florida for refusing to permit Cathy’s name to be on her own children’s birth certificates. Cathy and Karla also won that case and further advanced the rights of LGBTQ folks in Florida.
How to have the gay money talk
Do you and your partner have the gay money talk regularly?
Disagreements about money are the third most common reason for couples splitting. The second most common reason is intimacy. Talking about gay money will solve both problems and keep your partnership together.
Too often, our financial conditions and how we’ll manage money as a partnership is an afterthought. But it doesn’t take long for mismanagement, poor financial decisions and financial infidelity to become the dominant thought.
The shame is that just talking about money often helps couples manage their money better so that financial stress is mitigated or eliminated altogether. Also – and this is a big also – gay couples who talk about money are 54% more likely to report having better sex lives than couples who don’t talk about money.
What money matters should gay couples consider before, during and after marriage? Cathy shares a well of information on episode 24 of the Queer Money® podcast.
How do you start the gay money talk? Here are 5 tips:
- Blame us
- Have the money talk in public
- Focus on your individual and mutual hopes and dreams first
- Back into how you’ll reach those hopes and dreams
- Revisit the money-talk monthly
Watch us dive deeper 5+ years later on the best tips to have the gay money talk with your partner:
How can you get more Debt Free Guys and Queer Money®?
We’re David and John Auten-Schneider, the Debt Free Guys (www.debtfreeguys.com) and hosts of the Queer Money® podcast. We help queer people (and allies) live fabulously not fabulously broke by helping them 1) pay off credit card debt, 2) become part- or full-time entrepreneurs and 3) save and invest for retirement.
Get more tools to successfully have the gay money talk:
- 5 Tips for Talking about Money with Your Partner
- How to Start Being a Happy Gay Man
- Why Both Gay Money and Gay Pride Matter